I want you all to know this man. Everyone needs a Mr. Miagi. He is mine, and a part of him is in everything I do. Goes by the name of Larry Yelden, and is a king amongst big men in Venice Beach. He worked me out and I will never forget it. Larry, I hope I have made you proud. I love you man.  You made the Pillar that so many have leaned on. See you soon. X

It’s freezing cold, and you’re bus isn’t due for another 15 minutes…. This is dead time.

Until now.

I’m a shelter visionary, hoping to implement the ‘weights while you wait’ mentality across all public transport.

I don’t want a bus-stop, I want a bus-start. I am in talks with local councils to give commuters a real chance to travel light. Watch this space.

A guy came to me this week really ruffled – he was useless with the birds. Not the female variety, but the feathered. For hours he’d tried to attract them with his tired whistles, but even pigeons were giving him a miss.

Luckily for him, I have been whistling at birds for 7 years now. Not just ‘terwits’ and ‘terwoos’, but complex tweets, like the Ostrich mating call. (please feel free to drop in to Gym Box for a demonstration)

This guy just needed a boot in his ‘toot’. We did some vocal exercises, inspired from Venice Beach, and the birds have come flocking to his improved parps. Job done.

Do you love Yoga? Do you love Feng-Shui? Then you’ll LOVE Yog-Shui. It’s a 106% genuine Pillar fusion, allowing you to move your household shit about in a yoga way. Inspired by some of the biggest whackos on Venice Beach; join the growing list of clients that love it.

Call today and let me come round to your home and show you how to move stuff in a peaceful, time consuming manner.

No time wasters though; I’m not a removal man. I’m a ‘shui-move-all’ man.